At birth, Hugh was over ten pounds and tried to live ‘larger than life itself’.
As our first child, Hugh saw himself in a role of breaking in new parents.
In Loving Memory
Hugh Gordon Murray
October 20, 1987 – June 5, 2026
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In Loving Memory
October 20, 1987 – June 5, 2026
“Hugh lived 38 years, that is two thousand weeks, or 14 thousand days but I can recall only certain moments.”— Iris Kairow Murray, his mother
His First Months · 1987
At birth, Hugh was over ten pounds and tried to live ‘larger than life itself’.
As our first child, Hugh saw himself in a role of breaking in new parents.
We shared the challenges of sledding in snow, ice skating, gymnastics class and roller coasters.
A Millennial, he grew on the leading edge of the digital generation, moving from Reader Rabbit to Mortal Kombat much sooner than I preferred.
Hugh’s fast mind served him high scores in school. He had the enriched benefit from accelerated programming in ‘the gifted classes’ over 7 years.
We saw his competitive streak while making race cars with Scouts and ‘sponge games’ in middle school.
“He hated my puns. ‘You think you’re funny, Mom.’”
We saw his creativity in designing inventions — melting snow off roofs. His quick wit led to antics: as a prank he told his Sunday school teacher his phone was 967-11-11.
Hugh sang hymns in his choir but preferred chanting rap lyrics. He played with the trombone a bit.
He won races in track and field and enjoyed skateboarding. Hugh enjoyed wearing bright clothing. He loved our schnauzer Moxy-dog. He didn’t enjoy summer camp.
He was an amazing chess player and solid goalie on his soccer teams.
When each child was given a trophy just for their participation, I learned that he understood this to be a shallow gesture.
Hugh’s fast mind served him well in the gifted class programme — seven years of accelerated learning.
“Hugh lived 38 years, that is two thousand weeks, or 14 thousand days but I can recall only certain moments.”
Rectory Kid · Hamilton, 1998–2002
In 2000 Hugh started to suffer from sleep disturbances and began to be fearful. His restless path through the teen years twisted off course. Eccentric behaviours and unusual stories became frequent distractions.
So called ‘Tough Love’ did not work.
Cannabis altered connections in his mind such that psychosis persisted. He felt persistent headaches. With each psychotic break, brain tissue reduced, with some deficits from Schizophrenia being permanent.
“After graduating up the ladder of medicines, clozapine restored his quality of life.”
Hugh worked in restaurant kitchens and in a meat packing factory. Secondary school diploma graduation was in 2007, and later Hugh completed a course at George Brown. But I feel he earned credentials in resilience.
He was frugal, liked buying groceries and preparing his own meals. He found pleasure in eating, especially beefsteak.
Hugh liked to follow basketball’s March Madness, and he had a passion for football.
At home for 11 years, daily clozapine enabled Hugh to thrive in hobbies: swimming, working his way to blue belt in Judo, learning Japanese, playing the saxophone.
He did volunteer work at Woodgreen and St. George’s on the Hill. He spent time helping his Dad, until his sudden death in 2016 — a few days before Hugh’s 29th birthday.
“We all loved him deeply and we know that he felt loved.”
After Hugh completed duties as Executor of his father’s financial affairs, he decided to stop his medicine — because, as he explained to me: healthy people do not take daily medication.
Deteriorating conditions landed him back in hospital in 2018. Again CAMH helped him recover, and then Hugh decided on a rooming house in Oshawa.
Compared to typical adults, Hugh did suffer — with short stints in jails, long admissions in hospitals. Most recently, during 21 months, Hugh was bounced between 5 different temporary shelters for homeless people.
It was a rough and tumble existence on the streets which got him back on the same medicine that had kept him healthy for 11 years previously.
December 2021, CAMH arranged for a room in a supportive housing apartment on Eglinton Avenue West. Hugh felt content.
On the morning of June 5, 2026, that’s where he was found, following cardiac arrest while asleep in his own bed.
“His mental disorder was an added feature on top of a sharp mind, with a perfect sense of direction and an excellent memory.”
I learned a lot from Hugh: the role of luck, the impact from song lyrics, respect for all people with disabilities. I learned the role of paranoia, the limits of helping one another, several legal barriers to health recovery, and how to determine whether a person holds capacity for decision-making.
The meaning of his name is bright in mind and spirit. As he grew, he liked his uncommon name, most often just signing only his first name: Hugh.
by Iris Murray
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